Friday, 5 September 2014

Fabulous Friday

Happy Fabulous Friday! What's fabulous about today is Mummy steps. 
People talk about baby steps, but today, I'm celebrating Mummy steps. In a massive step forward for me, I have put Sticky's breathing pad away! 

For those who aren't familiar with a breathing pad, it's a pad that lies under the mattress and sounds an alarm if the baby stops breathing. I've been using it since Day 1!

It's funny, last weekend my brother asked if I was still using it. I told him I was and he asked how much longer she needed it. I told him until I was ready to take it away. He said "So when she's 16 then." He thought it was quite hilarious - I did not!

People are quick to judge and laugh at your Mother paranoia. It's easy when they haven't lost babies. It's easy when they don't understand the fear that constantly lives in your heart. It's easy when they aren't the ones squinting through darkness to check the baby's chest rises and falls. It's not easy to take the security blanket away.

But, I think this week Sticky let me know it was time. She's now moving so much in her cot, and has taken to sleeping across it. This means she comes off the pad and the alarm sounds. It happened twice this week - both times at 2am. It woke both of us up and neither of us got back to sleep. 

She's embracing her new found movement and wriggling about so much, I would need 6 pads to cover the whole cot. Even my paranoia has a limit! So, I figured it was time to let go. 

I must admit, it hasn't been easy. Even when I used the pad, I still went in to make sure she was breathing. But, I have put it away and I'm sure each night will get easier as I learn to trust she will be ok. I try not to think about the stories I've heard of babies dying from sudden infant death syndrome at 7 months. I just have to have faith that she's big enough and strong enough now to be safe. 

I think this is just another little step I've taken toward letting her become more independent. Last week it was sending her off to child care. This week, it's putting away the pad. I'm not sure what next week will be but I'll deal with it when it comes. Another Mummy step successfully completed!

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...