Tuesday, 13 November 2012

Remembering the man

In my last post, I mentioned I had said something to my husband in my wedding speech about facing the challenges life would throw at us. As I thought about that post, I had to laugh at the fact we lived in such ignorance of those challenges facing us so quickly after being married!
The below is an extract from my speech – made 30 March 2012!

“Marriage, like so many other things in life, is a leap of faith. It is a scary thing because there are no guarantees. There are so many things we don’t know about the future but I’d rather travel that path with you to find out, than let fear keep me stuck here.

It is with great thrill and excitement that I take this leap with you. We are explorers, venturing into new and strange territory. We will use our combined strengths to overcome the difficulties, find the solutions and navigate our way.

There will be times when we have to go through treacherous terrain, climb up steep hills, swim through wild rivers and sustain scratches and bruises. But there will also be times when the stars are so clear we can see the planets, the sunset stretches as far as the eye can see, and the immense beauty around us brings a tear to our eye.

We start this journey with a commitment to stand next to each other, support each other, hold each other and carry each other. There will be times when one will do it for the other, and times when we do it together. But the key word in all of that, is together.”

I mention this as the feelings of the father often gets overlooked in this process. Luckily, my friends and family always ask after my husband to check he’s doing ok. But men process these things in a much different way to women and that’s been interesting to learn that.

We had no idea this would be part of our future but I was spot on – I would rather be dealing with this with my husband than without him. He has been such a tower of strength and has carried us both when I didn’t have the strength to stand.

It was thrilling and exciting for us to take this pregnancy leap and I was certainly in new and strange territory. And yes, we have had to use our combined strengths to overcome this and still love each other through the process. I guess this is one of the things that can make or break a relationship. Luckily for us, it has continued to make it.

We have had to deal with treacherous terrain. We are climbing up a steep hill. And we most definitely have sustained scratches and bruises. But I know, with every fibre of my being, that the stars, sunset and immense beauty is awaiting us.  Actually, not to sound too corny, but I think we already have the immense beauty in the love, support and commitment we have to get each other through this.

Who knew my words on that fabulous day would be so prophetic – we are most definitely surviving, coping and moving on together!

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