Thursday, 14 November 2013

The little things that bring you joy

Our new couch arrived yesterday and I’m so excited to finally be able to sit down in comfort. But, the best bit – I have my very own, electric recliner!

When we bought the couch, we both wanted recliner chairs but soon realised it wouldn’t fit in our space. The negotiations started and I won the recliner! About 10 weeks ago, I reached the stage where it was difficult for me to get up from our old couch, and knew I wouldn’t be able to do it while holding a baby, let alone when my back goes out. So, we went couch shopping, splurged on the recliner, and now happiness is mine!

The breast feeding chair we bought to supplement the wait for the couch has been transferred to the nursery. I will use that for official breast feeding times, but the recliner means I can just sit and hold the baby if need be. Given I’m going to spend the next year of my life living on that couch, I wanted something comfortable. Luckily I have an understanding husband who let me spend the money on it!

I had my butt firmly planted in the recliner while watching tv last night. I came across a show that follows people in hospital. A woman going in for a twin caesarean caught me eye. Ever since my hospital class, I’m a little obsessed with watching women have caesars. I guess it’s just because I’m trying to be as prepared as possible for when my time comes.

The woman had had a difficult pregnancy and was crying as she went it. I expect that to be me. They cut her open and you could see the head of one baby and the leg of the other sticking out. They pulled out one, followed by the other, and took them away to check on them. Both let out a good scream but they were very small. The father went to look at them and gently placed his hand on their bellies. The woman cried as she watched.  I expect that to be me. Actually, given I was crying as I watched this, I know it will be me.

As it turns out, they needed to deliver the babies early as they had tangled umbilical cords. They needed ensure the babies didn’t pull on the cords, creating knots, which could have cut off their blood supply. That of course is my worse nightmare.

Sticky must have known I was getting upset watching this as she started rolling about. I think it was her way of reassuring me she was ok. But I said “Sticky, see what those babies did. Don’t you do that. You just roll about nice and gently in there and don’t twist yourself in anyway. Be a good girl and listen to your Mum.” I hope she listens to me!

The other thing I realised watching this is I still can’t process that in 10 weeks, this tiny person will be yanked out of me. I seem to be missing the part that connects the fact that the one punching and kicking me will soon be screaming and wailing in my arms. Maybe it’s because it’s too surreal to believe. Maybe it’s because I feel anxious about what I’m going to do with her when she arrives. Maybe it’s because I still carry some anxiety around her making it here safely. Either way, I better find that connecting piece quick smart because it’s only 66 day until she arrives! 

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