I'm lucky - Sticky doesn't really cry too often. It seems to be only if she's got gas, is over tiered or doesn't want to go to sleep. The fact is, I don't mind if she cries because it means she knows I'm here for her.
I remember when I was studying child development learning that babies of parents who don't pay attention to them give up crying. These might be parents who are drug addicts, alcoholics or ones that simply ignore their children. At a young age, babies will learn quickly not to waste their breath because they know no one will respond.
It breaks my heart to think of a little baby like Sticky simply lying in whatever place they're in, wallowing in their own pain. To think they are simply ignored or abandoned doesn't bare thinking about but the fact is that is the case for so many beautiful little beings.
As a parent of a newborn, their cries can become overwhelming, especially in the early days. You hate to hear them cry in pain or longing and will immediately jump to right whatever is wrong for them. As they grow bigger, you can tolerate the crying more but still feel guilty when you're making them cry like getting them to self soothe. I have to remind myself in those moments that there's no pain, no gain!
The fact is I'm glad Sticky cries. It means she's confident that there's a reason to - she knows I will come. I may not always come as soon as she would like, and that's because I'm teaching her to soothe herself, but she knows I will eventually be there. That in turn means she feels secure and safe, and at this young age, that's all I can wish for her.
So for all the parents out there who are struggling to deal with their babies crying, take heart. They are crying for a reason and that's because they know you can fix the problem. Sometimes the problem is hard to figure out but just keep reminding yourself that you must be doing a good job if they are crying for you. It means they trust you, feel safe with you and feel loved by you. What more could you ask for!
I remember when I was studying child development learning that babies of parents who don't pay attention to them give up crying. These might be parents who are drug addicts, alcoholics or ones that simply ignore their children. At a young age, babies will learn quickly not to waste their breath because they know no one will respond.
It breaks my heart to think of a little baby like Sticky simply lying in whatever place they're in, wallowing in their own pain. To think they are simply ignored or abandoned doesn't bare thinking about but the fact is that is the case for so many beautiful little beings.
As a parent of a newborn, their cries can become overwhelming, especially in the early days. You hate to hear them cry in pain or longing and will immediately jump to right whatever is wrong for them. As they grow bigger, you can tolerate the crying more but still feel guilty when you're making them cry like getting them to self soothe. I have to remind myself in those moments that there's no pain, no gain!
The fact is I'm glad Sticky cries. It means she's confident that there's a reason to - she knows I will come. I may not always come as soon as she would like, and that's because I'm teaching her to soothe herself, but she knows I will eventually be there. That in turn means she feels secure and safe, and at this young age, that's all I can wish for her.
So for all the parents out there who are struggling to deal with their babies crying, take heart. They are crying for a reason and that's because they know you can fix the problem. Sometimes the problem is hard to figure out but just keep reminding yourself that you must be doing a good job if they are crying for you. It means they trust you, feel safe with you and feel loved by you. What more could you ask for!
Wow, I really needed to hear this tonight. Just got M down for the night and am so glad I checked your blog before heading to bed. :)
ReplyDelete