Monday, 3 March 2014

Jabs, tears and wine

Sticky was 6 weeks old yesterday so it was time for her first vaccination shots. I wasn't looking forward to it and expected us to both be in tears. I shouldn't have underestimated us.

My Mum stayed with us for the weekend so came to the appointment to hold my hand. I had to go into the City so organised to meet my husband for lunch afterwards. We were all feeling quite chipper as she slept from 8:30pm to 5:30am. That was her longest ever sleep and gave me my second night in a row of 7 hours sleep. I was worried I wouldn't sleep well because I was nervous about the shots but I'm so exhausted these days I just pass out and her stirring is the only thing that wakes me up.

I had to get my whooping cough injection so I did that first. I wanted to show her how brave I was. I thought I would have her bottle ready so I could distract her pain with food. The first vaccination she had was an oral one that I gave her in a little tube. She didn't like it and choked it back, all the while looking at me with this look on her face that said "what's this weird crap you're giving me?" 

Then it was time for the needles. I gave her her bottle as the first jab went in. In an instant, the blood rushed to her face and she started screaming. The pain must of been so overwhelming for her as the scream got caught in her throat and she couldn't breathe. I panicked for a moment and just held her saying breathe, breathe, and suddenly, she gasped and continued crying. She stopped the minute I put the bottle back in her mouth and repeated the whole thing when the second needle went in.

The thing that killed me the most was the look on her face as I held her. It was this look of total betrayal. As if she was saying "Mum, all this time you've been lovely to me and now you're doing this. I don't understand." Tears welled up but I held them at bay. I want to teach her not to be afraid of needles so I knew I needed to be a good role model. I held her and told her she was ok. Again, the tears stopped and she sucked away on her bottle.

At lunch, I rewarded myself for being so brave with a glass of wine. Sticky was asleep and I was still a little wound up, thinking of her bright red face looking at me. I know how important it was to get her vaccinated especially with the dropping rates of vaccination. I don't get on my high horse too often, but I cannot comprehend parents who choose not to get their kids vaccinated. They not only put their kids at risk, but they put mine at risk too. We are lucky to live in a world without so many of the diseases thanks to vaccination. That look of pain on her face was enough to break my heart, I would hate to see the look on her face if she was to catch one of these diseases. 

We did well Sticky and I. She's had a pretty good afternoon and is a little tiered and unsettled but doing well. I have a sore arm from holding her but nothing too dramatic. Now, we wait to the next vaccinations at 4 months. I'll trust ourselves to be brave once more and have milk and wine on hand for medicinal purposes!

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