Monday 2 December 2013

32 weeks - 1 milestone down

I'm 32 weeks today which means one of my milestones has been reached! 

Reaching 32 weeks means we can stay at our hospital if Sticky comes early. Our hospital's neonatal unit is only equipped to deal with premmie babies from 32 weeks on. If she had of come any earlier, we would have had to have gone to another hospital. I never thought Sticky would come that early, but it's a relief none the less.

Today also means I only have 7 weeks until she arrives. I should have everything ready by the end of the week so it means I can then rest up knowing that whenever she comes, we're ready for her. I'm excited but nervous about the prospect of just sitting here waiting but I'm going to try and make the most of the last quiet time I have!

I cannot believe we are now in December. I have no idea where this year has gone but once again, it's flown by. I wasn't really thinking too much about Christmas until I saw a few people had read last year's Christmas post over the weekend. 

I guess the 1st of December makes people think about how they will cope with Christmas. It is even harder to cope with if you were meant to be celebrating it with a little one that didn't arrive so you need time to prepare. It broke my heart to realise that women were Googling how to survive Christmas after a miscarriage to have found my post. It means that there are women out there suffering in the same way I suffered last year. 

Re-reading my post made me realise that this should have been Peanut's first Christmas. I felt sad about that but I'm ok with it. Thanks to all the work I've done this year, I know Peanut wasn't meant to be here. I know next year is meant to be Sticky's first Christmas. But, while I know it, it still tugs at the heart strings a bit.

At the end of that post, I said that anyone who suffered through Christmas will have their fingers crossed that next year is better. I know that this Christmas will be better. It will be my last Christmas with my Grandmother and I intend to make the most of that. Instead of the emptiness I felt in my belly last year, I will celebrate the squirming baby I have in my belly this year. And as I sit at the table this year, surrounded by my family, I will take heart in knowing Sticky will be there to share it with us next year! 

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